GRADUATION!!!

So of course im a senior so im lookin foward to graduation. well duh!!!!! im jus ready to be done with school. i dont know if im gonna go to college or anything but i do want to. I just want to know what i want to do first before i go. I dont wanna waste all the money of goin and not get anything out of it.

This week im lookin foward to really nothing. Its jus a usual week for me.. school all week then workin both mornings at 5 am. but next week will be better. Im lookin foward to wednesday being my las day and not coming back thursday. Then graduation practice on friday and then i have a cook out wtih friends on saturday then graduation on sunday!!!


im also lookin foward to possibly moving out over the summer!

top ten

Top Ten Reasons Why Im Ready to Leave Oly





1. Ready to be gone... Ive been in school for 13 years now and im ready to be done. im ready to be able to have a life without worryin if i have school and work the next day. i realize that if i go to college ill still have to work and go to school but itll be a lil different cuz its not all as routine as it is now. its been the same way for last 3 years and im ready to leave.





2. I cant concentrate... Since ive been little ive always been the type to get my work done before i did anything else. Now i cant do a darn thing. i find myself puttin off work altogether until the las minute or lately it wont even get done at all. it even goes beyond school stuff that im not gettin done.





3. Im tired of waking up so early... For senior year ive had to be at school by 730 usually 4 days a week. thats way too early and way too often for me. Im ready to sleep in everyonce in awhile.. cuz i dont get to on weekends cuz i work then to.. so because i work all weekend and most of the week i really dont get a day off. Its either school or work.





4. I really dont do anything at school... Since im gone for work program i havnt really been able to stay in my school activities.. so whats the point of me still tryin to do everything when i dont have time.





5. Im tired of the ppl at school... After 6 years at one school (thats how long ive lived in the state) im tired of the same ppl. i mean there is people that im cool with at the school but nobody ready this can tell me that they arent tired of some people at the school.





6. Ready to start my new life... Im ready to leave high school and grow up. It seems time to grow up and get out and start doing new things.





7. Ready to move out... Im ready to get out of the house with my parents. They drive me insane.





8. I hate having to come home early... Every night after work i always end up in lincoln hanging out with most of my friends. I hate how i have to come home early to get up for school the next morning. I mean im supposed to be home by 10 by i usually arent but i still hate coming home when i do.





9.

internal conflict

so everybody knows in high school relationships come and go. you can like a person and nobody even know. well there is a really good guy friend of mine that i like. we both know we like each other and we both act like it too each other. when we are together we act like we are dating and we talk on the phone every night like we are dating, in everyway we already are dating.. but the conflict.
we dont know if we want to be together officially. i dont want to mess up our friendship and all that good jazz but i dont want him to be with other girls..

so to get over it i basically just dont let it get to me. i just tell him i dont care what happens as long as he doesnt lie to me.

perfect boyfriend

My perfect boyfriend would be hard to explain. I mean who says anybodys perfect and who says that you can plan what is perfect for you when at 18 or even 17 you really dont know all of what you want for perfect. But if i had to choose i guess it would be like this..

He would be 6'2 (i have a thing with tall guys) light brown short hair. Not buzz cut short but not long enough he looks emo. he would probably have blue eyes. Hed be kind of skinny. I guess you could say built but not like body builder type but just looks like he works on cars or something. not trying to hard butt still if you and him are jokin around he can pick me up and throw me around. Hed be sweet of course. Know how to joke around but when you want to just get away from all the drama me and him could jus sit there and talk for hours. I would want us to have our own friends so we arent dealin with the he said she said dumb crap, but also we'd both have to get along with the others friends because friends are important to me.

id want him to be like a year or two older then me so the maturity level is up because thats one of the things i cant stand from people when all things are are drama. He knows how to joke around and have fun and get in a little trouble but not like jail time trouble. down to earth. he knows what hes doing when it comes to fixing stuff because i suck at it and hed have to know because when it comes to fixing things im dependent on people.

Hed like to work on cars and just hang out. He has to have a sweet truck. im upsesed with nice jacked up trucks so hes gotta have some fun toys that i can take and steal and play with everyonce in awhile when me and the girl friends wanna go out and just have some fun. :-)

week 2

If i had a movie made about me i think i would want to be played by Carrie Underwood. I know she is a lil older but not that much. She seems to be the down home type, just the normal girl and doesnt really try to be the size negative like alot girls out there.
For one of my best friends it would probably have to be Jordan Sparks. She is a girl that looks bout Jordans age and their body type is kind of similiar. They both seem to be about the holesome and just living.
For another best friend i would probably have to pick Paris Hilton. They both like to party and have a good time. Sometimes neither of them make good choices and still they come out okay. Even though they both are not the brightest they still make you laugh at the dumb stuff they do.
For one of my best guy friends i would probably pick Josh Nichols because they both are not that skinny but still you love them for them. They both seem to know how to have a good time and goofy as heck.. and thats why we love them.

The plot for my movie would probably just be surviving high school and work. goin out and hanging out with all my friends and explaning the dumb stuff we do and the trouble we get into. And how we get ourselves out of the trouble everytime.

regrets

when i was younger i lived in iowa. my mom and dad had been divorced for i dont know how long and i lived with my mom. i saw my dad on visitation on weekends every once in a while. well she and her now husband got together and they both worked at the same place. but when that place got closed down her new husband jerry got a job offer in illinois bout 2 hours away from burlington (where i lived). well the decision was made that we were gonna move there.

looking back now i couldve went to court and petitioned to move full time with my dad and stay in iowa. i wouldve been around my family the whole time rather then moving. i would be able to see all my family all the time instead of the only few times of the year that i get to make the trip back to iowa. i think i would be totally different because i would never have met anybody that i know now. i know that the way we grow up is because the way people around us. we are us because what we see and what we are around. i would be totally differnet. i dont know what wouldve happened if i wouldve stayed because i dont know who i would be around and i dont know what i wouldve done, but it is for sure things we wouldve been so different.

weeek 8

The smell of spring reminds me of hanging out with a friends at the park. We always are outside, always hanging out. We would just pull the cars up to us and play music and sit around and talk. Laughing and having fun, really doing nothing then just sitting around and having fun with friends

It reminds me of simpiliar times when you didnt have any real worries. You could just wake up at noon on a saturday and just sit at home with the windows and doors open and just watch tv. Wait for your friends to wake up and all come over and just sit up somewhere and just hang out. Not worrying if you have to go to work or worry about colleges and the rest of your life basically. Not worrying about having to leave early because of major american gov homework but just being out til late into dark and druging home to do it all over again the next day.

week 7

I know its wierd but i hate when the toilet cover is.. not the seat but the cover over the seat. i could be im jus in there doin my hair and i have to put it down just because. i we have 2 bathrooms in our house and i use one and my mother and her husband use the other. i hate when either of them use my bathroom and dont put the cover back down. i ALWAYS yell at them when they leave it up. its usually along the lines of, "you wouldnt want me to come in and mess up the way you have your bathroom would you????"

week 6

Since i turned sixteen i had a job. I have worked at the Hopedale Medical Complex for OVER 66 years now. I could do that job in my sleep, (which i sometimes did on weekend mornings after i stay out til like 12 or 1 then have to be at work at like 5), i could never forget it if i tried. But what i do there is basically serve the food to the residents of commons (between elderly people living on there own and a nursing home, can take care of some things for themselves but not all) and then do the dishes.

Since i have worked here for all of my life im goin insane. When i had just started there we all used to joke around saying you have to be insane to work there, i think i truly have. i dont just feel like i work there, i feel like i live there. and blend in seeing as all the residents here are like 70.

childhood toy

when i was younger i always had my blanket with me. I know its not really considered a toy but it was the one thing that i always remember and played with it all the time. Of course i would sleep with it (duh) and keep me warm wen just sitting around the house doin absolutley nothing. i would use it to lay on or jus kind of a security thing.

it was a blanket that was made for me by one of my grandmothers.. she made it for me and had little bears all over it. Though after time went on the back come off and the stuffing started to fall out, but my mom sewed new material on the back.

Though i dont keep it with me 24/7 now i still have it.. its in a zip lock bag in my closet so nothing happens to it.. id prolly be so upset if something did

week 5

Dear Future Child,
Im a quiet person but also a loud person at the same time. When im with people i dont know im usually quiet and just sit back and observe everybody i guess you could call it. But when im with people i know and am comfortable with im loud and have the nickname "mouth." I hope you end up being a good person. I hope you listen to your parents (hint hint) and do your best in school (im not sayin you have to be a genious but just do your best). I hope you stay out of trouble. I just want you to know that the world is a big place, you can do anything and everything you want. Though some people seem harsh and mean, others are not the same. There are good people in the world, just sometimes its hard to find them.

week 4

Ive had a dream that i was out of school and living on my own. I was working at a great job and happy i remember that much but i dont remember what the job was. I was in a great relationship with a guy named matthew. we lived together and was totally happy. I had a great relationship with my family even though they live so far away.

In the dream we went back to iowa to see all of my family. We had a fun road trip laughing and playing around. When we got back to town i got to see all of my family. Seeing my baby cousin and my grandpa that we know wont make it much longer but hes still here. And see my fav cousin that has her beautiful baby girl. After the long day of seeing all my family we went back to our house and our happy lives.

If i could i would make that dream come ture i would. Being out of school and being happy with someone. Being able to see all my family and just be around them is something i wish i could do more often.

week 3

so brigs put no post so im just gonna ramble.. DRAMA!!!!!!! thats all the seems to included with high school. even for the people who dont pay attention in class, dont do their homework, or dont even pass their classes they still have drama. in my almost four years of high school ive seen my own fair share of drama. but in the last year ive steped back a little bit and seen how different things can look when you yourself is not in it. ive stoped hanging out with alot of people from olympia b/c thats all this school seems to be. For example, one of the girls i used to hang out with that went to olympia moved here from pekin. we got along really well, now through some of our own fights we dont talk, but that doesnt mean i go around talking crap about her. i love her and always will.. she knows alot bout me and i know alot bout her and her boyfriend but that doesnt mean im going to go around and tell everybody everything i know. we dont talk anymore and thats that. but before she moved back to pekin, she had a sign put up on her locker saying what she sex the baby was. (if you couldnt tell shes pregnant.) and just before she moved somebody wrote "slut" all over it and colored over the words and ripped it down. i just dont understand how people can be so cruel. she had been with the father of her baby boy the whole time she was pregnant. they love each other and now have a beautiful 8lb 12 oz baby boy that was born on the 23rd.

week 2

Laying in bed, looking around but seeing nothing but black. Just the faint glow from the blinds of the street light below. Wanting to run and hide, wanting to be out of the dark. But too scared to move, to get up and even turn on the lights for comfort. Laying so quiet, not wanting to breath. Just to be invisible, not known that im there.
I pull the covers down slowly, barely moving as to not make a sound. Moving to the edge of the bed i take a sprinting start. And then there, im there, lights on and nothing in the room. All the fear gone.

Week 1

when we were little and in school the teachers would make us read poems and all kinds of poetry. it seemed like most of it rhymed and had a certain way to it. like same number of lines everytime and same number of words. just always seemed to have the same theme. but now that we are in high school and learning more things that are less basic we are told things totally different. in class brigs said that we will be writng poems soon, but he said nothey dont have to rhyme and no they dont have to be in a certain order.